AN ASPIRIN A DAY TO KEEP HEART ATTACKS AWAY.

One of my all time favorite movie quotes is from Forrest Gump:  “Life is like a box of chocolate, you’ll never know what you'll get.”  For our lives, and dare I say it, for almost everyone’s lives, that is a very true statement.  Life is different, unique, challenging, and some days really hard.  Each day is so different, you will never know what you’re going to find.  Even on what seems to be a mundane ordinary day can end in a life altering way.  Monday, May 19, 2014 was that kind of day for us.

Our day started off as usual, kind of.  I had been up almost all night not feeling great with my allergies and sinus pressure going crazy.  Robert got up and headed off to work as usual, nothing extra ordinary there.  Functioning on only three hours of sleep was really getting to me and by 1:30 I told Maggie that I had to lie down.  I put Cole and Jacob in bed with me, put my phone on silent, and tried to catch a nap.  Cole fell promptly to sleep, Jacob tossed and turned, nursed, fussed, nursed, and then fussed some more.  Maggie took him and tried to rock him.  I dozed off and on.  Around 3:00 I gave up and reached for my phone to take it off silent.  That’s when I read the text.

Don’t panic, I’m ok.  

Had some chest pains so I am in the ER here in Lakeland.

Don’t panic, yeah right!  Of course I immediately called, didn’t get an answer, called again, called again, and Robert finally answered.  I grabbed Jacob, changed into a non bleach stained shirt, and made the 45 minute trip to Lakeland ER.  On the way I called my folks, Robert’s parents, made arrangements for kiddos, and prayed.  As funny as this sounds, all I could think was he couldn’t die on me, I had just ordered Cole and Jacob some cute Father’s Day shirts from Old Navy and Robert hadn’t even seen them yet. 

At the ER I went in and watched the monitor closely.  All of Robert’s vital signs looked great, as a matter of fact, his blood pressure was better than mine!  The doctor came in and said that everything looked good, the blood work, EKG, and x-ray were all clear.   This meant we had two choices, admit him for 48 hours for a stress test or make an appointment for a stress test.  Of course Robert wanted out of the hospital, so he agreed to make a follow up appointment and be evaluated for a stress test.  We were sent home with a prescription for aspirin daily and the phone number of who to follow up with.  Tuesday, Robert was back to work as normal, I was getting aspirin and setting up appointments, and trying to not totally panic.

Robert told me it felt like lead was sitting on his chest.  That feeling spread into his abdomen and then his arms starting tingling.  He also said that he was pretty certain it was just a stress induced anxiety attack, which he didn’t think it was a heart attack, even though that was what his symptoms showed.

 I will be the first to admit that Robert has been under a lot of stress.  I will also be the first to admit that I do not understand what it feels like to be a hard working man who must provide for a large family.   What I do know is that this has really, honestly and truly, scared me more than I have admitted to everyone.  As a matter of fact, I’m pretty terrified about becoming a widow at 36.  More than that I’m terrified that my five little ones will not be able to grow up with their Daddy.   This is something that has caused me two very restless and sleepless nights. 

I do know that God is in control.  I do know that I am not to be anxious for anything or to worry about tomorrow.  I do know that I am to trust God in all things.  I do know what Christ has done for me in the past, and that He loves me more than I can fathom.  I do know all of this, I do believe all of this, but I am still battling with very real fear too.  This just shows how imperfect I am.

So we are waiting for Robert’s follow up appointment and if his referral for a stress test.  In the meantime, Robert is purposing to relax more, taking his aspirin nightly, and looking into ways to be less stressed about life.  We are talking about a short family vacation and maybe a weekend away for just the two of us.  We are also looking at eating less, exercising more, and being better and more responsible about our lives in general.

An aspirin a day to keep heart attacks away sounds really good to me!  I’m praying that with God’s grace that small pill is all that will be needed and Robert and I can continue our lives together, for at least 50 more years.  Truthfully even another 50 isn’t long enough.