HOW DOES YOUR GARDEN GROW?

Recently Maggie has been learning about greenhouses, soil types, and horticulture in her AG class.  Bringing this knowledge home she asked if she could make a garden.  Of course being the responsible parents that we are, we told her to have at it.  I will readily admit that I have a black thumb.  I can’t grow anything.  I can remember when we were dating; Robert made an amazing garden, so I’m hoping she takes after her daddy when it comes to her gardening skills.  We shall soon see.

When Maggie was talking about what she wanted to grow, she never mentioned corn.  John Robert loves corn, and he wanted to grow corn.  So, when we got Maggie her seeds, I got John Robert some corn.  Of course this worked out well for Maggie; she got some strong arms to help her in her gardening ventures, and believe me when she chose the old hog pen, she needed some strong arms.

The kiddos chose the old hog pen for their garden.  We haven’t had any hogs in it since last August, so we figured the Florida sand that we live in here on the ridge had a lot of quality nutrients left in it.  This is where Maggie was more than happy to have John Robert along for the ride.  The weeds in the old pen were thick, almost waist high in some spots.  Without any instructions or input from us, the big kiddos got to work.  Well, I think Maggie and John Robert got to work, Ethan did what he does best: supervises!

The pen in the beginning.  See how high the weeds are!

John Robert weeding and working diligently!

The cows loved the weeds the kiddos threw over the fence!

After a full afternoon of work, the kiddos little garden was planted and ready to go.  Not only did they plot the area, they organized where each item was to be planted, and they weeded everything on their own.  There was no input from Robert or I in any of it.  Their garden was done in a day because of their own initiative and hard work, and to me, that’s what matters the most.

Taking a small break. 

Time to start planting!

Maggie planted bell peppers, green beans, onions, and lettuce.

At the top of Maggie's plot of veggies, John Robert planted his corn.

The end of a hard Saturday.  

 I am beyond thrilled about this garden.  Not because I want the veggies to grow, because I do.  Not because I want my kiddos to enjoy the fruits of their labor, because I do.  Not because I’ve always wanted a garden, because I have in spite of my personal black thumb.  No, I am beyond thrilled about this because my kiddos did this all of their own initiative.  This garden is 100% their pet project.  They took it upon themselves to plan, work together, and execute their plans.  If nothing in the garden grows, my kiddos are amazingly successful in my eyes because they worked together.

As my big kiddos get older I want them to have a lasting friendship.  I want them to enjoy spending time with each other, not because we are forcing them but because they legitimately enjoy each other.  This garden is a huge blessing to me because it is the columniation of my dream for my kiddos.  Not only are they siblings, they are becoming great friends!

So, Maggie and John Robert, how does your garden grow?  With lots of teamwork, hard work, a little bit of luck, and most of all a lot of love and friendship.

I’M ALMOST 40! Or things I wish I would’ve known about myself sooner!

I want to chat with y’all for a minute.  I am less than two weeks away from my birthday.  This birthday reminds me that I am inching closer and closer to the BIG 4-0!  Yep, you read that right, I am almost 40, and surprisingly I’m not that upset about it.  I think it’s because no matter how close I get to the big 4-0, I know that Robert is still that much closer.  Or maybe it’s because we have so many little ones running around that I honestly don’t feel that old.  Perhaps it’s because the older I get, the less the age matters.  Or maybe, just maybe it’s something else.

If I’m being honest, I think that it is something else.  I am finally happy with me.  I am happy being a little overweight; yep I am not high school thin anymore and I honestly don’t care.  I am happy with my stretch marks; they show the lives that I have chosen to nurture and the legacy that I am trying to leave.  I am happy being someone who went to college late in life but is choosing to not use her degree;  I know what matter the most right now is my children and not my career.  I am happy being a mom of a HUGE brood of children; I honestly love having a big family and caring for my five kiddos.   In all honesty, I wouldn’t mind having more!   I am happy with being married to the same man for almost 19 years; I am thrilled that he is still loves me, warts and all, and is still here after all these years.  I am happy to be learning and growing as I mature; I am forever changing, learning, and growing and that is a huge gift.  I am happy with me!   Honest to goodness happy with me.   I just wish it wouldn’t have taken me almost 40 years to get to this point.

If I could go back in time I think I would know what to say to a young me.  I’d tell me to love more and worry less.  The problems that seem so extreme are honestly forgotten within a year.  And let’s be honest, a year is nothing in the lives that we live.  I would tell myself its okay to do what I think is best.  I can be a strong and independent woman and still honor my husband, my family, and most importantly my God.  I would tell myself that I do matter.  What I think, how I feel, what I believe is important.  I don’t have to limit or sacrifice myself to please anyone else.  I can still be who I am and be happy even if everyone around me doesn’t like what I think or say.  I would tell myself that looks really do fade.  I never thought I’d ever get bigger than a size 12, and now I’m a 14!  I never thought I wouldn’t wear makeup everyday or not polish my toes as soon as they chip.  As I’ve gotten older I’ve learned that the outer beauty isn’t as important as being me, I just wish I would’ve found this out sooner.  Lastly, I think I would tell myself that no matter how I look, what I think, or how I feel; I AM ALWAYS ENOUGH!  I might be totally imperfect, make a ton of mistakes, but in the end that’s who I am!  I am a perfectly imperfect daughter of the King.  I was made in His image, for His purpose, and for His glory!  And I’ve learned that’s enough!

Yep, I’m almost 40!  Yep, it’s no big deal.  Yep, my life isn’t perfect, I’m not perfect, and I am totally fine with that.  After all, I like being me.  I am happy in my own skin and I know who I am in Christ.  Knowing this, being 40 isn’t that big of a deal, it’s just another birthday, and I’m all for celebrating a birthday!

Mingling of Souls Weekend

This past weekend Robert and I attended a marriage conference facilitated by Matt and Lauren Chandler.  Sadly, we missed the first two sessions on Friday night because of Robert having to work late and having puny kiddos, but we were able to escape for the last two sessions on Saturday.  We enjoyed the conference, we really did, but I enjoyed knowing that we’ve been doing some things right within our relationship because of who we are in Christ.

Robert and I married young.  I was 19 and he was 20.  We celebrated out 18^th wedding anniversary last December.  We made a lot of mistakes in our early years, but some things that stood out to me were the things that we were doing right.  In reality our premarital counseling wasn’t that great, you know: Robert tell Jennifer she’s pretty and Jennifer don’t forget to cook for Robert kind of advice.   We had to learn a lot of things on our own and as a result, we were able to walk away from the weekend with a new respect for each other and the work that we’ve put into our 18 years of marriage and 22 years of being Robert and Jennifer.

Our wedding, December 5, 1997.

  Some of the advice that we took away from the weekend is NOT to grow lazy in our relationship.  We date each other.  Not every week, although we do try to do that, but at least twice a month.  We flirt with each other.  Not in an overt way, but the subtle way of fun texts, grabbing each other’s hands,  grossing the kids out with some slight affection (in our own home of course), and laughing together as much as we can.  We try to break up the monotony of our lives.  We purpose to go away at least every other year for a weekend.  We need that escape; it gives us a chance to reconnect as Robert and Jennifer the couple.  We’ve changed over the years.  Robert isn’t the shy 20 year old groom and I’m not the naïve 19 year old bride.  We are maturing adults complete with all the responsibility that comes with adulthood.  We have the cars, the mortgage, the kids, the pets, and the bills that all come with being a married couple.  Taking that weekend off gives us time to reconnect not in our roles but as to who we are.  I love that we do this, and truthfully I wish we could do it more often!

Our weekend away in Gainesville almost six years ago to attend some friends wedding.

The last piece of advice that was really profound to me was that we need to guard against laziness in our relationship.  It is so easy to take each other for granted.  Every day we need to purpose to build each other up.  I am not the best at this as I should be.  Oftentimes I feel overwhelmed with my life and don’t always think to encourage and love Robert through his.  Yet, we are in this life together.  I couldn’t be the woman that God created me to be if I didn’t have Robert as a husband.  Not being a lazy wife is something that I really do need to work on, and I’m purposing to remind Robert of how amazing he is at least once a day!  The only way I can do this is to remember who I am in Christ and the grace that He has extended to me.  Through this grace I can overlook the faults and see the amazing man that he is and encourage him to be the man that God created him to be.   This is how we can guard against laziness, by purposefully looking for the good, being an active participant in each other’s lives, and still purposing to love each other; no matter what!

Just a Friday night date after the business of Christmas.

Robert and I really did enjoy the conference this past weekend.  It was a moment in time where we could focus on ourselves and how we can continue to grow in our marriage.  Loving each other is a choice.  It’s a choice that we’ve made every day for the last 18 or so years of our marriage.  It’s my prayer that we will have another 50 years of life together; the good, the bad, the messy, the fun, and most of all the love.

LIFE HAPPENS

Hi All!  Have you missed me?  Truthfully I haven’t been on in forever for a legitimate reason, I was hurt.  See I have had my feelings hurt, immensely by a family member, and I knew that if I were to put myself out there in cyber space I would have the potential to do or say something that I couldn’t take back.  So, I opted for silence.  Maybe it wasn’t the best choice, but for me it was the safest.   Some days I think that we need to remember that we need to do what is best for us, even if it’s inconvenient or wrong to others.   However, now I am here so let me catch y’all up on our lives.

Our lives happened.  We have endured and dealt with the good, the bad, and the ugly since we chatted last.  We’ve had four more birthdays, one more anniversary, two more deaths, and mourned the anniversary of the passing of our son.  I still can’t believe it’s been three years since Samuel was Heaven Born.  As a family we celebrated Maggie turning 15, John Robert turning 12 in November.  We had a great time at my parents’ house for Thanksgiving, sticking close to home because of Robert’s job.  In December we celebrated Cole turning 4.  As a couple we marked out 18^th wedding anniversary and celebrated 21 years of being Robert and Jennifer.   We remembered Granddaddy Massey on his 81^st birthday in December.   We celebrated Christmas, our first one without some key grandparents, and honored Grandpa Peacock’s life on New Year’s Eve with chicken and dumplings.    We took time off for Youth Fair and enjoyed watching Robert as a judge for the Whip Popping Contest.  We ended January on a high note as we celebrated Jacob turning two.  We had his celebration at Youth Fair since his birthday was the night of the whip popping.  It reminded me of my birthdays spent in Bartow. 

We also had to endure three weeks of ER/doctor visits.  We had to learn how to uses an Epi pen since John Robert ran a bad reaction to a bee sting.  We had to take Jacob to the ER for “nurse maid elbow” or a dislocated elbow.  We got to take Cole, Jacob, and Maggie to the doctor for sinus infections that wouldn’t heal no matter what we tried.  We have endured the changed with Robert’s work schedule, changes that have left us missing him as he works crazier and crazier hours.  We have faced all of this and made it through to stand here, in February.   At the end of January we met with a precious lady for our homeschool evaluations and determined that the kiddos are on track for what they have learned.   We still have the youth meeting every other week to have a safe place to ask those hard hitting questions that plaque us in our teenage angst filled years.  We are still here, still moving forward and pressing on.

So forgive me for my lack of correspondence.  I promise to communicate more.  I am still growing, changing from the person I was into the person that I want to be.  I can say that we are here, still the Best Family in Town, and we aren’t going anywhere!