AVERAGE, BORING, ORDINARY DAYS

Ok, so I will be the first to admit it.  I am not as great at this blogging thing as I thought I would be.  After all, there are only so many days of me saying: “Wow, my kids are so amazing” that people really want to hear.  AND, if I am being totally honest, there are days when we are all just plain boring.

Take, for example, today.  I have schooled three children.  I have read countless stories, including Mountain Born, the Usborne Encyclopedia, Eagle of the Ninth, Caps for Sale, Harold and the Purple Crayon, Crictor, and Agustus Ceaser's World until I am tired of reading (GASP…..did I just admit that?!)  Add to that the four loads of laundry that I have washed, folded, and put away, plus the kitchen that has been recleaned; and you have an ordinary, but somewhat boring day.

Yet, in spite of how ordinary my day has been, I have done exactly what I was supposed to do.  My children have been schooled and are relatively happy.  Their progress in their school is nothing short of amazing (or at least to this Mama who is really enjoying seeing the wonder of it all on a daily basis!  I love the a-ha moments when they finally grasp something that they were really struggling with!)  I have a fairly clean house.  I have happy, healthy children, I have a content husband who delights in coming home to us, and of which I am most grateful that after almost 14 years he still chooses to come home to us, and I have supper planned.  All in all this ordinary, oh-so boring, average day has been perfect.

Guess what, God has delighted in it too!  I know He did because of the laughter that I hear in my children’s voices.  I know He did because He smiled as we talked about 1 Peter 2:17 and what it means to serve and respect others and then put that in action.  I know He did because I know that He loves me for being me: average, ordinary, Mama Bear ME whom He created and knew before He formed this world for this time and this purpose!  Does it get any better than that?  Really?

  So there you have it.  Our lives are made up of average, ordinary, oh so boring days.  I wouldn’t trade them for anything in the world!

THINGS WE DO FOR OUR CHILDREN!

I love my children.  I adore how individual and unique each one is.  I love how they are so loving, caring, and even on their best days not perfect.  I am often in awe of them when they accomplish something as simple as remembering how to spell a hard word or even remember their address.  Each day they make me smile with their quirky ideas, fun and silly sides, and overall loving nature.  I love my children because they are mine.  There isn’t too much that I would not try to do for them!

Which leads me to my thoughts for today!  We have been hit with either a bug or a bad case of food poisoning.  Either way all three little ones were away for the weekend and got some upset tummy’s.  The older two were able to over it quickly.  We are on our third day of having the living room set up as “Sickness Command Central” for the little one.  There is a mattress on the floor for Mommy or Daddy to sleep on, extra clothes and wet wipes handy, Gatorade and applesauce at the ready, Germ-X bottles everywhere, and Lysol on standby at all times.  You could say that this isn’t my first rodeo, we have been down this road more times than I care to count.  Yet I do not hold it against my children that they are sick.  I am not upset that I have had to bleach bathrooms daily or wash whites for the third time this week.  There is not much that I would not do to love and care for my children, and that includes sleeping on the hard living room floor for six months if need be!

As a Mom, it is my JOY, yes I mean joy not job, to take care of my children.  If I have to sacrifice something to meet their needs, so be it.  I am, after all, first and foremost a mother.  There are days that I am tired, there are times when I feel alone, there are times when I am frustrated.  During all these times I remember that I am always their mother.  I will do what needs to be done to ensure that my children are happy and healthy.  I will do this to the best of my ability, and I will do this gladly.

As I was laying on the floor with the sick little one snuggled close to my side, his hands clutching me as if I was his life line at 4:00 this morning, I realize that I am modeling love to my children.  If I am willing to sacrifice this little bit of my life for them, maybe they will learn to recognize what real love, what a real sacrifice looks like.  This in turn lead me to think about my Father, God on His throne in Heaven.  How many times do we cling to Him, willing Him to be our lifeline when we are sick or hurting?  How often do we take the time to recognize the sacrifice that He willingly made through the death of His child, Jesus Christ on the cross?  How many times am I truly willing to snuggle down next to Him just to find my rest, to be healed?

I’d like to say that I was perfect and ran to God with everything, never messed up, and of course, never “sinned” anymore; but that would be a major lie!  One thing that I do know is that my Father is always waiting for me.  He delights in me whether I am sick, sad, lonely, happy, silly, and yes even when I mess my life up.  He is always waiting for me, arms wide open, I just need to crawl into His lap and grab a hold of His lifeline.

As I am called upon to snuggle down and sing Jesus Loves Me for the 100^th time today, I hope that I will stop and really think about what that means to me.  As I am asked to clean bathrooms, sanitize the kitchen, and wash yet another load of clothes; I pray that I will do so lovingly and without complaint.  After all, the sacrifice of my time and care cannot compete with the sacrifice of the cross, and just as my Father, I will ask for nothing in return.  I will cherish the time that I get to spend with my children, and pray that I will be the Mama to them that they deserve.  I hope that they will see the love of Christ in me, even on these hard, lonely sick days.

WALKING DOWN MEMORY LANE

I am not a usually sentimental person.  Oh sure, I save a few things that my children have given me, and I have all the love notes and cards that the man that is my wonderful husband has given me in our 17 years together.  BUT, for the most part, I throw away all the little drawings, colored pictures, and refrigerator art that decorates the life of a mom of three little ones.  I have enough clutter in my life, I do not need to keep everything!

Recently, however, the children and I cracked open Mommy’s treasure box, the mysterious hope chest at the foot of my bed.  The children were in awe at what Mommy considered to be treasures.  The ring box from my engagement ring, the shirt that Daddy was wearing when our darling daughter was announced as coming into our loves which just so happened to be the shirt he was wearing when she was born, all their coming home outfits, all their first Christmas outfits.  What a treasure trove of memories.  Oh how the children loved seeing their “past” brought to life by real and tangible items.

This made me think about the verse that is so relevant to our modern “I need more society” which is Matthew 6:21.  I like how the NIV states it, “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”  I understand that Christ was telling us to store our treasures up in heaven, but it made me stop and think, what is really important to me here on earth?  What are my treasures?

Certainly my husband is a treasure.  He was chosen and made just for me, a person can’t get more precious than that!  All of my children (the ones here and the little one that we are waiting for his big arrival) are all treasures.  They are a reward, a gift from a loving God that gave me the man that is their father!   My family, brothers, sisters, parents, all of them are a treasure.  They have also been gifted to me to enjoy and create lasting memories with.  My friends are treasures because, after all, they are the family that we choose to love!  Perhaps the greatest treasure that I have been given is that of my life in Christ.  I can be me and I am wonderful to Him!  What a treasure that is!

I will continue to purge my gifts from my family and children.  I will continue to store things that are of the utmost importance to me.  I will continue to cherish my friends and family and save mementos of my life to look at as I walk down memory lane.  Let me ask you, what are your treasures?  Where does your heart lie?

SMILES FOR A MOTHER’S HEART

We are homeschooling now.  We are a new homeschooling family that has struggled with many seemingly “easy” issues.  When do we do school?  Why should we do school?  Do we really have to do math?  Is reading all those books really that important?  On and on over the past month the questions have come and on and one I have purposed to persevere through them all.  Yes you have to do school work.  Yes math is important, just like Seth says, “Math explains the world”.  Yes you have to read.  Reading opens the door ways to the imagination and opens your mind to the world.  On and on, day after day, week after week with no end in sight, or so Mommy thought. 

Finally, here at the end of our 5^th week of school, a miracle happened.  Well, maybe not a miracle to the millions of other families that are homeschooling, but a miracle nonetheless to me!  Yesterday we took the day off.  Mommy needed a break, kids needed a break, house needed groceries.  We took our monthly food allowance and headed to two different grocery stores, coupons in hand.  Just for fun I even splurged and bought candy bars.  Something interesting happened when we got home and put everything away, the children still wanted to read.  Ummmm, okay, go ahead.  Next thing I know out comes their school books.  Hmmmm… this is an interesting development.

Now comes my miracle.  This morning I was awakened by the youngest member of our family because he had a bad dream.  After spending the night tossing and turning with feet, hands, and little knees and elbows in my back I gave up and got up.  I was tired and had a headache.  I mentioned this to the other two dear children when they awakened.  Mommy is tired, can we just take the day off?  Their answer:

I want to do math.  Aren’t we going to read our books again today?  Hey Mom, can I do just a little bit of spelling?  Why are we taking today off too, we need to do our school work?

WOW!  Talk about making this mother’s heart smile.  So like the dutiful mother I am, I showered, took some Tylenol, and tackled the day.  Math got done.  Spelling got done.  Reading got done.  And my wonderful son finished reading his first ever “big” chapter book all by himself.  He even told me what he liked about the story and all about the main characters!  What a great day!

When we brought the children home to school them, our main desire was to create in them a love of learning that will last a lifetime.  There have been days that I have prayed and asked God if we were doing the right thing.  Yet, in spite of my doubts and insecurities I pushed forward, hoping that the children would decide to love learning.  Proverbs 3:5-6 tells us to “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your paths.”

That has certainly been the case today.  Not only did God direct my paths but He gave me a miracle, a reason for this Mommy’s heart to smile.  I am not naïve, I know that there will be battles in the future.  I know that there will be days when no one wants to do any schooling but we will work to get things done.  But today, today was like a bear hug from an awesome God, and it all came from my children who made this Mommy heart smile.

MY GOOFY CHILDREN!

There is something incredibly special about being given the privilege of being a SAHM!  I work hard every day and the rewards are endless.  Where else can my pay be given in hugs, kisses, and “I love you Mommy?”  Nowhere, and it is wonderful! 

Okay, some days are more wonderful than others, and I will be the first to admit that I don’t love everything about motherhood.  I mean who loves being awakened at 12:30 am because someone has gotten sick all over their bed?  Or loves the mountains of laundry that three small people can generate, add a baby and you are washing clothes at least 100 times a day!  And the cooking, why do these people need to eat so much?  I mean you would think that once a day would be enough, but noooo….these needy people want breakfast, dinner (lunch), and supper (dinner), with a few snacks thrown in between!  Let’s be realistic here people!  I love my children but wish they came with a self cleaning and feeding mode! BUT, I digress.

What struck me today, as I was watching my children play, was how wonderfully silly, well goofy really, they are.  Take, for example, my youngest son.  After asking if he could walk to Granny’s house (which I said yes to of course), he loaded up his bag of toys and headed out.  An hour later he was home complete with the bag, missing all the toys, and carrying a small bottle of orange juice.  When I asked him if he had a good time his exact words were: “Yes Mama, but I just had to get away from you!”  See what I mean, he’s a goofy kid!  Next thing I know he and his brother are wanting to be fed (for the second time of the day) and are dressed in their pajama’s playing; well I don’t know what they were playing it was a cross between Transformers and WWF wrestlers, or something like that I think!  Made me smile!  Add into the mix my preteen daughter who always has an MP3 player stuck to her ears, her toenails polished no less than two different colors at any given moment (today they are purple and orange!  Seriously, purple and orange?!?), while reading a book to the aforementioned brothers on my bed no less; and you have a house full of goofy kids!

This, of course, led me to thinking about all the crazy wonderful things that I did when I was younger.  (For the record, I was an angel……just saying!)  Which in turn lead me to thinking about God and how He deals with us: His goofy kids!  I wonder how often he looks down on us and sees us playing at life.  We play at church, we run away from Him because “we just need to get away”, we play at our jobs, we play at well, life.  Yet He sits there waiting patiently for us to get it all together and realize that we need Him and love Him.  He smiles at us as we do silly things.  He loves us when we do wrong things.  He cares for us when things seem unchanging and unfathomable. 

I am thankful that I get to go on a daily adventure with my goofy kids.  I am thankful for forts, unmade beds, sloppy hugs, interesting song choices, laundry (did I just admit that), and well for the joy that they bring!  I’m also very thankful for the daily reminder that I am just a goofy kid too, that God loves me for a thousand reasons or more, and that I can be, well ME, and that is okay!

Now, has anyone seen where the boy has hidden the pillows from my bed since they are cubes of power that need to be protected from the evil robots invading?

MIRACLE FROM GOD!

Today we found out that our new Little Bit is going to be another boy.  Some of us in our house are not happy, mainly the girl that is now totally surrounded by brothers and boys constantly.  I must admit that I have suspected it was going to be another boy since finding out we were going to be blessed again, but I am also disappointed that it is not another girl.

This led me to thinking.  Dangerous I know, but what can I do?  Why should I be unhappy with the blessings that God is giving me?  All I want is for this little one to be healthy.  All I want is for this baby to be blessed and grow up surrounded by love.  Why then am I disappointed that it is another boy?

Here’s why…….I miss pink.  I miss dresses.  I miss little ribbons, cute pig tails, and polished little toe nails.  I miss the idea of tea parties, dress up, and baby dolls.  I miss little kitchens; Barbie’s everywhere, and well, the general paraphernalia of a little girl.  I miss the idea of little kisses and hugs wrapped in girlie giggles and Mommy / Daughter time.  I miss taking my little girl to town when she is dressed in her princess dress.  I miss being a Mommy to a little girl.

As much as I miss this, I do know what I am.  I am the proud Mommy of a beautiful young lady.  I love how grown my daughter is and how she is willing to help.  I love her spirit, how she knows what she likes and why she likes it.  I love how my daughter is not interested in boys yet; no one is as strong, handsome, or mature as her Daddy!  I love how my daughter can be delicately beautiful and then tougher than most boys.  I love how my daughter can cook up a storm, clean a house in no time flat, and still know how to hunt and fish.  I love my boys, but my little girl holds a very dear place in my heart.

We will welcome Cole James sometimes in early December.  We will love him because he will be our gift from an amazing God.  In the meantime, I will enjoy my Starbuck’s run with my daughter.  I will covet her laughter, wisdom, and maturity.  I will relish being the Mommy to only one girl, and pray that I will be the best Mommy to my darling daughter that I can be.

YES, I ADMIT IT ~ I’M NOT PERFECT!

Okay, I will admit it.  There are days that I struggle with, well, life!  I work very hard to balance home, school, housework, homeschooling, being the encouraging wife, laundry, dishes, cooking, and laundry.  Did I mention laundry?  When I want to do something for me, I feel like I just don’t have the time.  Who can find the time to be everything to everyone?  Some days I feel totally overwhelmed, exhausted, and yes in spite of a house full of children alone.

Today has been one of those days.  Oh it is nothing in particular.  Maybe it is the rain.  Maybe it is the fact that the laundry that I folded and put into the appropriate child’s basket still has not been put away.  Maybe it’s the fact that I realized that I have not sat down to scrapbook for 3 years.  Maybe it’s because I am missing the “me” time that I was always able to find when we just had 2 children and I wasn’t in school full time.  Maybe….well maybe it is a lot of things.  In spite of this today has been a day of struggles.  Oh there is nothing in particular, just a blah day.

This has lead me to thinking about a lot of things.  Why am I so blah?  Haven’t I been abundantly blessed with everything that I desire?  Didn’t I always want to grow up?  Well, I’m grown!  Didn’t I always want to be a mom?  Been there, done that times four now!  Didn’t I always want to be a teacher?  Doing that too!  Why am I so blah?

The answer is simple, I’M NOT PERFECT!  To those of you who know me, this will not come as a big surprise.  I am not Super Mom!  I am not Super Woman!  I am just me, purposing to honor God the only way that I know how and be obedient to His call on my life.  For me that means washing clothes, doing dishes, cooking more food to be devoured by three hungry children, washing more clothes, educating aforementioned children, and deciding that yes I am worth the time to try to carve out some scrapbook time!

I know that I am not done running the race set before me!  I know that I cannot grow weary while doing good, although on days like today I am tempted to do just that!  I know that I am not perfect, but I know that I don’t have to be!  Jesus said that His yoke was easy and that His burden was light.  So on my not so perfect blah days, I can run to Him and be okay! 

 YES, I ADMIT IT ~ I’M NOT PERFECT, but that is what makes me wonderful and I know that it is okay!  JESUS IS PERFECT~ HE’S THE ONLY ONE THAT MATTERS ANYWAY!

PREGNANANCY AND JESUS: They are more alike than we realize!

Pregnancy has a way of taking the focus off of me and putting it onto someone else, the miraculous person that God is allowing me to create with Him.  Why do we allow our lives to get so focused on ourselves that we forget the big picture?  In short, it is because of our selfish, sin filled nature. 

In Ephesians we read that we do not battle against things of this world but against the powers and principalities of darkness.  If this is the case, why do we not think that there is a battle for our thoughts and our desires?  Should we not realize that the Evil One is after all of us?  If he can cripple us to the point of not being able to function, of being so trapped in ourselves that we cannot survive without the approval of others, than he has succeed and we are nothing.

Okay, I know what you are thinking, what on earth does this have to do with being pregnant?   Here’s the thing, when a woman is pregnant she is overtaken by someone else.  My actions are not based on what is good for me and me alone, but now I worry about what is beneficial to the baby as well.  I desire and want to do different things.  For example, I LOVE garlic in any food.  BUT, being pregnant right now, my body rejects anything that has to do with garlic.  I also LOVE sweet tea.  Being Southern this is my nectar from heaven.  Guess what I have not been able to drink!?  As a matter of fact, I can only have one glass of decaffeinated tea a day!  The rest of my day is spent drinking at least 1 ½ gallons of water!   This is not who I usually am.  I am changed because of the overflowing life that is within me.

The same is true when I am filled with the overflowing power of Jesus Christ.  I am taken over by someone else.  It is not what I want that matters any more.  Just like while I am pregnant my tastes change, having Christ in my life changes me.  I see things differently.  No longer do I want to do everything that the world thinks that I should do.  I want to live more for what Christ desires. 

Are there days when I want what I want?  Of course, BUT on these days I need to spend time on my knees focusing on Christ instead of me.  Not always easy when the world around me bombards me with images of what I am supposed to be.  If my house is not spotless, if I am not driving a brand new car, if I am not raising 2.5 children, than I am a failure.  BUT, this is not what Christ says.  Christ says that I am to take up my cross and follow Him.  I am to not worry about how my home looks but open it up to showcase the love of Christ to others.  I am to not worry about what kind of car I drive, but how am I using the car is what matters.  I am not to limit myself to what is “normal” when it comes to my family; I am to allow Christ to choose how many miracles He wants me to have.  I am to die to myself and my wants and desires (like how I desire a great big glass of sweet tea), and live daily for Christ.  He is to overflow my life.  He is to be the only one that I worry about.

This is how pregnancy and Christ are similar.  They change a person, from the inside out.  Just as my belly grows with the image of a new life; my heart, mind, and actions need to grow showcasing the love and actions of Christ.  It is within the confines of this outgrowth of Christ that I can grow lovelier.  I am a Daughter of the King.  It is time I reflect that daily.  It is time that I showcase my pregnancy belly proudly.  It is time I showcase my Christ even more proudly!

The Road to Healing

          Within all of us is the nature to hold onto our anger, our bitterness, and our hatred.  It is in grained in all of us, to do what is right in our own eyes.  The Bible makes it very clear that we will always be willing to what is right in our own strength.  We often try to rely on our own wisdom instead of seeking help from others.  Our days become battle plagued as our minds battle with the wisdom that God wants to impart on our lives.  Proverbs 14:12 states: “There is a way that seems right to a man, but in the end it leads to death.” (NIV)  Our own strength, our own choices, our own wisdom will lead us to sin; sin leads us to death.

          What can we do?  Recently we have been battling this very issue in our home.  There have been days that anger has been at the forefront of our minds.  We have been dealing with hurt feelings which in turn lead to anger and then bitterness.  We have wrestled with admitting that we are sin filled.  We have wrestled with the fact that we need to admit that we too have played a part in the issue.  There are days when we need to admit that there are times that we need to be changed more than the person that we are mad at.

          The good news is that the cross is big enough to bear all our sin!  The good news is that: “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” (1 John 1:9 NIV)  All we need to do is be willing to run to God, confess that we have done some wrong things, cling to Him and His promise of forgiveness; then we will be okay.  Yet, we don’t want to have to do the confessing.  We want to cling to our anger.  Why?  Simply because it feels good.  Sin leaves us with the desire to turn into ourselves and shy away from God.  This is why we don’t want to confess anything; we want to hide our faces and our shame.  Yet it is in this hiding that we do the most damage.  We carry our pain and hide from the God that wants to set us free.

          We are on the verge of some amazing things in our house.  We are on the verge of purging our home from past bitterness, old hurts, and old regrets.  We need to learn to be more committed to flowing Christ.  In Him and Him alone will the healing that we need take place.  After all, “Jesus looked at them and said, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God."  (Mark 10:27 NIV)

CATCHING UP ON LIFE

It has been a while since I have shared my thoughts about life with everyone.  Don’t get me wrong, it’s not that I haven’t had a lot of thoughts or a lot happening in our lives, BUT, I have been so down and even busy that I just have not felt much like sharing.  Not a very good blogger am I?  Okay, here goes the rundown of the past few months.

In March after Grandpa’s death I had the privilege to celebrate my birthday.  I am not going to share exactly how old I am, but those of you who know me already know!  It was a little rough being so close to the time that Grandpa passed away, but it was a wonderful time anyway.  To make up for the lack of “fun” at this time of year, my amazing husband got me my new ruby bracelet.  It was something that I have been wanting for a very long time and I was most excited to get such an amazing gift!

In April we celebrated the Resurrection of our Lord and Savior.  This was a lovely day, quiet and low key.  Something’s were going on with Mommy and life was not as it should have been.  SURPRISE!!!  At the end of the month we found out that we were expecting baby #4!  What an amazing gift to be given.  All three children were very excited, and have even named the baby “Little Bit”.  Robert was also very excited.  All in all it was a great, albeit busy month!

In May we had the unique privilege of celebrating E-Man’s 4^th birthday!  Oh my how time does fly.  Of course we had a wonderful party complete with pizza and Transformers.  We also had our first ultrasound and determined that Little Bit is due in December, the 8^th to be exact.  December is a busy month for us.  Robert’s Granddaddy’s birthday is Dec. 3^rd, our 14^th anniversary is Dec. 5^th, Robert’s Granny’s birthday is Dec. 8^th, and his Aunt and Uncles anniversary is Dec. 9^th.  Needless to say we are hoping that Little Bit makes his or her arrival around the 10^th or so.  I have been diagnosed with anemia and dehydration so I have been feeling really, really bad.

Now we are in the swing of summer, dealing with Florida’s incredible heat and humidity.   We are looking at starting our new homeschool year the first week in July since Little Bit is due in December.  We are using the Sonlight curriculum and have had the fun and privilege of opening two boxes from Fed Ex that had over 100 pounds of books.  Needless to say, we had to purchase two new book shelves for around the dining room table!  The children have been looking through their books for days, I have to shoo them out of them constantly!  We are looking forward to taking a mini family vacation in July, possibly going to the beach again.  Robert and I are going to be taking a Baby-moon to St. Augustine as well.  Since we can’t get away for our anniversary, we are going to get away after Robert’s birthday.

All in all, it has been a very busy few months!  I promise that I will purpose to not be gone so long, or at least try to not be gone so long!  If we have learned nothing else in these past few months it is that God is faithful, He is in control, and His timing and blessings are always on time and perfect!!!  All in all we have been abundantly blessed!  Talk to you all soon!

DEATH: The Gift of Life is God’s!

There are many that are afraid of death.  There are many that look at death as the final punishment for a horrific life.  There are many that believe that there is nothing to look forward to; that once one is done here on this earth there is nothing more to worry about.  There are many that believe that at the time of death the dying has control over their life that they can look for angels to rescue them and take them to heaven because they were good enough.  God or what we have made into God, loves enough to let anyone who tried their very best into His perfect heaven.  After all, that is what love is, right?

As I have the joy (yes, I said and mean joy) of watching my 80 year old Grandpa pass from this world to the next, I have noticed many things.  For many, death is tragic; there is no hope or joy in the death of a loved one.  This to me is so sad.  How can one live and continue believing that once a person is gone, they are gone forever?  This offers no hope for me at all.  Not something that I want to believe in.  Then there are those that want to believe in God but not conform to His standards and what He says.  They will release their loved ones to angels, not knowing that even the angels were created by God HImslef and are considered to be lower than we human beings are.  After all, doesn’t the Bible teach that God sends His angels to minister and protect His children?  Why should an angel be the first thing a dying person sees, why shouldn’t they see the face of their Creator, their God, and their Savior?  I believe that this is always the case for the adopted children of God, which brings me to another point….

When you accept Christ as your Savior, you are part of the family of God.  You are chosen by God to be a part of His family, to showcase love, respect, and honor to the other members in your family.  Yet, there are many that can not even show love to their own birth families (and I will admit that there are many times that I am unloving and even angry over choices and actions of members of my family, BUT that is not where I want this to go sooo… I beg your forgiveness if I have ever offended or hurt you, we are family and I do love you.) Often times a death rips a family apart instead of bringing it together.  How often do we hear of that one relative that plunders through everything after the funeral to make sure they get exactly what they want, with no thought or feeling to the other family members?  Death, when looked at through this scope is tragic, something that is not to be celebrated or embraced, but something to be scorned and hated.   How can one have peace watching the death of a family member?  

I believe that the answer to this, and any other life issue, can be found directly in the Bible, God’s word.  Indeed Psalm 139 tells us that God formed us in our mother’s wombs (making no one person a mistake or an accident), and that He alone has numbered our days.  I believe that when the Bible says in Ephesians 2 Christ knew us before He created the foundation for the very world that we live on, that He loves me enough to want the best for the life that He alone created.  I also believe the Bible where it teaches that the only way to access our Creator is through Jesus Christ, (John 3:16-18; Romans 5:8), that it is Christ alone through His perfection that can give us access to Heaven (Romans3:10, 1 Peter 3:18), and that for the true believer and follower of Christ, death is not the end but the beginning of a victory! (1 Corinthians 15:56-57)

 Knowing this, having this hope and this peace through my relationship with Christ, I know that death is not the enemy.  Family matters to God.  Our lives, even the mundane details matter to God.  How we live, the choices that we make matter to God.  Death, for the Christ Follower is not a punishment but a blessing.  It is time that we begin to act that way.

I love you Grandpa, and when the time is right, I will see you in Heaven, with my Jesus!  Until then, I rest knowing where you are.  After all, “To live is CHRIST, to die is GAIN!” Philippians 1:21

THE JOY IS THE JOURNEY!

Stress happens!  We all know that life is unpredictable, unstable, and the only thing that remains the same is that life is constantly changing!  Not every one day is the same as the last one.  My reality is not the same as yours.  There is more than one way to saddle and ride a horse, there is more than one way to walk down the path of life.  There is more than one way to live.  The key to all of this is to find the joy in the journey.

So often I allow life’s circumstances rob me of my personal joy.  God’s word is very clear on this, “giving thanks always for all things to God the Father in the name of our Lord, Jesus Christ.” Ephesians 5:20.  Anyone else feel totally overwhelmed, unprepared, unable to do this, in other words, totally humbled?  How can I, me; the woman that most people seemingly over look, the woman that spends days  at a time stuck in her house(yes, days, there have been weeks when the only time that I have left the house was to go to church on Sunday!)  washing clothes, cleaning up after children, educating the same children, dealing with fights, laundry, dirty noses and dishes, find reasons to give thanks?  What am I supposed to thank God the Father for?  More laundry?  UGH…I HATE laundry!  (Well, hate is too strong a word….I don’t like sorting, washing, drying, folding, and putting laundry away, but that is in another post isn’t it?)  How am I supposed to all of that and still find the joy of the journey?  

I can’t do this!  I am totally unprepared to be joyful when we discover a rat’s nest under our bath tub because when they built the house they left gaping holes in the floor!  Not just one hole under the sink but seven and two more that were left open under the cabinet!  UGH!  How can I be joy-filled in our latest remodeling venture?  My house is torn apart right now and, believe it or not, the mess and chaos is driving me insane!  Add to this the three children that are home with me, filling my days with their needs, like food, and I am not finding joy at all!  I am finding chaos, confusion, one bathroom, and in general…STRESS!  How can I be prepared to find the joy of the journey?  How can I give thanks for all things, including the seven inches of dust, one toilet, one shower, and a huge mess?

One word; ATTITUDE!  How I relate to others and the world around me is a direct reflection of what I truly believe about life, and that is shown in my attitude!  I am not perfect.  Okay, no big surprise there….anyone who knows me knows that I can probably stand to loose a few pounds, that I can probably stand to not eat another piece of chocolate, that I could probably try to exercise more patience and organize my home a little bit better.  BUT, the good news is that I don’t have to be perfect!!!!  I’m never going to be perfect!  I just have to be like Christ, He will perfect me in His timing and in His way!  “Therefore, be imitators of God as dear children.  And walk in love, as Christ also has loved us and given Himself for us.” Ephesians 5:1-2b.  That is the key to finding the joy in the journey….walk with Christ, imitate Christ, and love like Christ.  Children fighting, no problem, love can guide the way.  One bathroom, no problem, Jesus will shine as I wait patiently while my little E-Man is singing and taking his sweet time in the bathroom.  Laundry, no big deal, I can hold and pray for the clothes that will be worn by my family and ask that God provide them with a divine opportunity to reach others for Him while they are wearing their favorite clothes.  

Stress, who has time for that?  I am too busy, purposing to imitate Christ, purposing to love like Jesus, purposing to be who I should be.  I am NOT the woman that is overlooked, underpaid, and unappreciated, I am a Daughter of the King!  That is why I can give thanks for all things!  I am a Princess, and that is where I can find my joy for the journey!

TO LIVE IS CHRIST, TO DIE IS GAIN!!!

For the first time in my married life, I was really scared!  One of my biggest fears is that I am going to become a widow.  Last night that almost happened.  BUT, God in His infinite wisdom, mercy, and amazing grace, had other plans!  THANK YOU, GOD!

I thought that my awesome husband was going to die last night.  Honestly truly thought that he was a goner.  Turned out to not be a heart attack but to be a stress induced episode.  Stress can kill you, imagine that!  Sitting there in the hospital room, watching my husband, friend, mentor, life partner, lover, and father of my children gasp for breath with blue lips terrified me.  Mere words can not do justice for what I was feeling at that moment.  Images of me raising three children all alone filled my mind.  What would we do, how would we go on, how would we survive?

I’d like to say that I immediately thought of Bible verses and was clamed, but that wouldn’t be the truth.  One verse came to mind, and (I can’t remember its address, forgive me), “To live is Christ, to die is gain.”  In that moment I knew that everything was going to be ok.  That was my moment of big comfort, to be reminded that if my husband died he would BE with Christ, he would be OK!  I also knew that I would be ok too; after all to live IS Christ!  Can you fathom that?  Can you understand the immediate peace and comfort that I found from that one verse?  If you know Jesus, you can, but I digress.

Today I was also given the ability to reflect on what happened and understand some essential truths that I had not understood before.  God’s word is very clear about stress in our lives and what we are to do with it!  Don’t believe me; check out Psalm 32, made a huge impact on me today!  God is also very clear in what He thinks about His children and His desire to be with them and love them.  This was made very clear sitting in the hospital room watching my husband gasp for breath.

I am a firm believer that God allows things to happen in our lives to bring about good, for His glory and His purposes. (And I do know this one’s address, check out Romans 8:28).  I don’t fully know the reason that my beloved had to endure what he went through last night.  I know that I had a greater appreciation for his snoring and cover hogging last night.  I know that when my boys came in to snuggle we appreciated the fact that Daddy was there to snuggle with.  During Bible this morning we told each other reasons why we love each other and how much we mean to each other.  As wonderful as all that was, and as important as all that is, what truly matters to me is what God did for me!  

God worked a horrible fear out for my good!  He reminded me that I am not in control of life, He is!  God reminded me that He will take care of me; I don’t need to worry about it!  He gave me the opportunity to talk to my husband about what matters, our dreams, our fears, our worries, and yes what stresses us out.  He also ministered to me through the gift of a friend that I haven’t seen since high school.  God worked all this out for me, after a horrible night!   He is amazing isn’t He?

Truly: TO LIVE IS CHRIST, TO DIE IS GAIN!!!!!!

HOMESCHOOLING ~ A Two Week Review

Okay all, here is what has been happening in our home over these past two weeks.  I can honestly say that I have never been more flustered, organized, disorganized, unmotivated, motivated, and ready to veg out as I am now.  Confused yet?  Good me too but let me explain!

I KNEW that God had confirmed that we were to be homeschooling, and He has continued to do so throughout these last two weeks.  I KNEW that it was going to require time and sacrifice on my part.  It is never easy to put someone else’s needs ahead of your own.  As a mother with all her children home at all times that is exactly what I am doing, daily!  I KNEW that I needed to make up a schedule and stick to it.  I KNEW that there needs to be total organization, total and complete control, and total dedication on my part.  Now, here’s what I didn’t know!

I didn’t know how much my children were going to LOVE this new lifestyle!  I was really worried about their lack of friends and not having the interaction with their peers like they are used to!  BUT, I was not expecting them to develop such deep friendships with each other so rapidly.  Since we have been home together (for one whole month now), the children are squabbling less.  Yes, there are moments when the brother / sister pestering does occur, BUT it is not as often as it was when they were in school!  WOW!  Coincidence, I think not!  Another thing that I have noted is there is more desire to help each other.  “I can help make your bed”, or “I can help you read that”, or “I can help you with your Math”, are being heard more and more in my home.  That makes me smile!  My house is also cleaner, (did I just admit that!)  Why?  The children now SEE what I do all day long and are willing to jump in and help me!  For example, I needed to vacuum the living room, but my boys (without even being asked) took it a step further and vacuumed all the seat cushions on all the chairs and the couch!  A servant’s heart attitude is being cultivated!  YA-HOO!

Another side effect we are noticing from our new adventure is that there is more of a peaceful spirit in our home.  We are praying together more, talking about Christ more, what He wants for our lives and not what we want!  We are reading God’s Word together daily, at a consistent time and in a verse by verse manner!  While we focus on one main Bible study each week (like Creation, Adam & Eve, Cain & Abel, etc), we read the story verse by verse and break down what we can learn from the story.  For example, while we are studying Adam & Eve this week, we learned that God DOES chastise when we sin, BUT He always loves us and provides a provision when He is done disciplining us!  This has lead t o a great discussion on what sin does to us and why!  WOW!

There have been days when things were not on task!  There have been days that I have had to throw our schedule out the window; like when Daddy calls and needs Mommy to bring him his sunglasses and coffee to work since he can’t make it through the day without them!  There have been days when it feels like all I am doing is picking up papers, play-doh, washing clothes, and explaining exactly what front end estimation is (for the 100^th+ time!!!!), and there are days that I want to stay in bed a little longer because my life outside of the children has not stopped.  Yet, in spite of it all, I KNOW that my children are home with me, where they belong!  I KNOW that we are doing the right thing, in spite of what well meaning friends and family might say.  I KNOW that I will look back on these days of math, puzzles, cutting everything in sight, poetry lessons, proofreading, spelling tests,  and play-doh and smile.  Why?  Because at the end of the day, obeying Christ in the  raising my children is worth every minute of hardship that I might encounter!

Now……does anyone know how to get dried play-doh out of carpet?

HOMESCHOOLING! Why we are walking down this path!

The reason that we feel that we are being lead to homeschool is simple and yet complex.  We want our children to have a firm Biblical and doctrinal sound foundation.  We want our children to have a global Godly view point with a focus on missions, a fluent love for reading and learning, and a desire to see the whole world saved.  While it may seem counter productive to pull the children "out of the world", who better to instill these belief's in them than their parents?  We feel that the Bible is very specific to the need of a parent to educate their own children and the role that we are to play in their upbringing in the Word of God:

• We want our children's mind to be renewed by Christ daily (Romans 12:1-2)
• We want the children's lives to be built upon truth (Matthew 7:24-27)
• We believe that as their parents, the situations that we put them in are the character issues that will be sown as they mature; therefore we want to sow their hearts for Christ (Galatians 6:7-9)
• We believe that our children are our greatest earthy possessions and that we must be good stewards over their lives and the time that we have with them (Romans 12:1-2) and value their eternal worth (Matthew 6:19-24)

As their parents we believe that it is our responsibility and God given privilege to train them and assist in molding them into the adult that God would have them to be, we believe that this is done through:

• Ensuring that the children are taught in a way that is toward their learning bent, emotionally, educationally and spiritually (Proverbs 22:6)
• That their training is our responsibility and that we have been commissioned to teach them to walk in the Ways of Christ. (Deuteronomy 6:6-7)
• We believe that we are called to pass a righteous and godly heritage onto our children (Psalm 78:1-7)
• We want the children to know that they are a blessing and of the utmost of import to us, a gift that God Himself has put into our house for His purposes and His desire. (Psalm 127:3-5)
• We believe that the children need whole hearted education including the confines of sin and its destruction on us. (Proverbs 13:24; 22:15, Hebrews 12:9).
• We want our children to watch, learn, stand, sit, and walk within the confines of the wise and not be swayed through peer pressure and the influence of “the foolish”. (Proverbs 13:20)
• We want to guard the innocence and character of our children, not so they are naïve or blinded to the reality of this world, but so that they are protected from falling into corrupt and morally bankrupt society. (1 Corinthians 15:33)
• We want to protect the children from becoming yoked and bonded to unbelievers, emotionally, spiritually, and socially. (2 Corinthians 6:14)
• We want to ensure that the children are not under the influence of false chatter, teachers, or teaching (2 Timothy 2:16-19)
• We feel that it is our responsibility as parents to direct our children, redeem the time that we have with them before Christ returns (Ephesians 5:15-17)

The list can go on and on. This is not something that we have taken lightly, but have sought after God’s heart in many ways.  We are parents that genuinely enjoy being with our children, that genuinely miss them when they are gone, that genuinely feel called to be parents.  We also feel that this is the direction that Christ is calling us to, for all the reasons listed above and for many, many more!

While we realize that this is NOT a family adventure that is for all families or should be taken lightly, we feel that this is what we are being called to do!  There will be sacrifices on our parts, we know that this will come at a cost, BUT, if we want to live radically different for Christ, isn’t the sacrifices worth it?  We believe that they are.

So welcome aboard to our newest Best Family Adventure!!!  Stay tuned for how life is going, what curriculum we are using, what works for us and doesn’t work for us!  Most of all, stay tuned to see how our children’s lives are radically different and how we are growing together as a family, being molded more into the body of Christ!