A MOTHER’S LOVE

There is something unique and special about a mother’s love.  No one can really understand it or appreciate it until they are given a child of their own to hold, gaze into those little eyes, and have a hand grasp them in pure love.  It is a unique bond that is formed in a mere moment of time.  There is something about a mother’s love.

Today I had the privilege of sitting in the hospital while my mom had to undergo cancer surgery.  I do mean what I said, it was a privilege, and I know this because my sister and brother could not be there and I know that they wanted to be, but the privilege of this task came to me.  I sat in the waiting room in the hospital on the same floor that I was in when I lost Samuel.  I was with family and it wasn’t as bad as I had imagined it to be (isn’t that the way that it always is, we imagine the worse?), and I did fine until Mom was wheeled out of recovery and into her room.

The nurse came and got us so we could see her.  She explained that she was going to be out of it, feeling loopy from the anesthesia, might be nauseous, and might not remember that we were there. She walked us right into the room next to where I was just five short months ago.  Mom smiled as we talked to her, but truthfully snored off and on more than acknowledged us.  All of a sudden her eyes opened and she told me to come to her.  I was afraid she was going to be sick, but she called me closer.  Leaning over her bed, she grabbed my hands and with her eyes shut whispered:

          “Are you alright? Is being here upsetting you?  Are you ok?”

I almost cried right there.  Here I was worrying about my mother, worrying about her diagnoses of cancer, and worrying about my Dad; and her main concern was me.  Yes loosing Samuel was hard.  Yes returning to the hospital on the same floor just a week after his due date was painful.  Yes seeing all those little babies in the nursery was heartbreaking; and I will admit for a moment I thought that my family should be here visiting me and a new baby.  In spite of that in that moment I realized the depth of a mother’s love.

I am humbled and overwhelmed.  I am loved and it was amazing.  Sitting in the hospital I was wrapped in love, and I felt God there.  On the way home as I thanked Him for that gift, I thanked Him for the opportunity to be there.  I thanked Him for a Mother’s Love, a love and bond that is so strong that nothing can take it away.

I LOVE YOU MAMA!  And I can’t wait until you are awake so I can tell you!